Tatler canine bloodbath

15 January 2013

Tragedy has struck Vogue House this morning as the sad news emerges that Tatler’s famous in house dachshund, Alan TBH Plumptre, is dead. Details are sketchy at the  moment and Condé Nast are refusing to comment beyond saying that there was an ‘accident’, but Mr Steerpike can reveal London’s most glamorous puppy was killed by the revolving doors.

Alan’s owner, editor’s assistant Jennifer George, has broken the corporate silence: ‘he was so awesome and so very loved’. The little dog’s loyal social media following is distraught: pictures of Alan looking cute in the office were never ending. Thankfully no one was sick enough to capture his last moments, because, if rumours going around the building are true, the poor wee hound was decapitated.

UPDATE: Fashionable sources stress that rumours of decapitation are untrue, though The Spectator understands that it was still rather grizzly. Fire engines had to be called to free the poor pup.

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  • ProperDave

    It’s ‘grisly’, not ‘grizzly’. Don’t you have subs at The Spectator?

  • Badly Done Emma

    They’re a ridiculous breed anyway….lots of them have back problems. Alan did have a cute face though, well he’d have to wouldn’t he….

  • Andy Man

    I’ve no idea what this article is about, but will say that this is the last time I’ll be reading the spectator. Fuck you Steerpike.

  • Karen Barclay

    Wee soul.

  • Simon Fay

    This is surely some sort of AbFab parody. Or a publicity stunt.

  • AdemAljo

    Anyone who names a dog ‘Alan’ is looking to inspire comedy.

    ‘Alan was out chasing birds in the park.’

    ‘Alan just pissed on that taxi.’

    ‘Alan was sliced in two by a revolving door.’

  • Sarah

    Nothing is real in Steerpike world.

  • Louisa McCarthy

    this is very sad. horrible tone in this piece

  • Jebediah

    Nasty article. The grisly death of a well loved animal is not funny. Shame on you.

  • John Fazio

    Which part of the article is in bad taste? The headline perhaps? It reads pretty matter-of-fact like to me.

  • Sarah G

    Bad article. What a beautiful dog. How can you make the death of a gorgeous creature a mockery?

  • Sue Ward

    I am disappointed that The Spectator has seen fit to post this horrible piece.

  • Lyra McKee

    This article is in incredibly bad taste. The writer seems to view the death of an animal as a joke.

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